I'm not sure I can make it through the rest of the Last Comic Standing season. It's a badly done show. And the people aren't that funny. Or the editors are super unfunny.
Anyway - so, after half-watching some of the preliminary rounds (thanks to an itchy fast-forward trigger finger), imagine my surprise to catch up with last night's episode this evening.
After however many weeks in however many cities of auditions . . . . After however many rounds in Vegas to narrow the field to the top twelve. . . . Out of an entire country of would be stand-up stars . . . . Do you know how many of the top 12 wishfulls were women?
No really, guess.
You're telling me in ALL OF AMERICA - no wait, the imported some unfunny Brits as well - they could find only TWO WOMEN WHO MADE THE CUT?
Forget the characters: that's unfucking believable. And you know I dislike F-bombing on a family blog.
And do you know who the two women were? One is legitimately funny, and I don't want to Elle-Woods her, but she's The Hot Girl. She's funnier than Sarah Silverman. But homegirl works the cute, tomboy, perky-boob shirts for her gigs. Hey, whatever, at least she's talented.
And do you know who the OTHER GIRL was?
Our racist Asian-dreamgirl-stereotype who's stage bit tonight was just more of the same Asians look the same! Everyone has an Asian girl fetish! No one dates and Asian guy! bullshit that wasn't funny during the Vegas round. And she delivered such with her pigtails and fuck-me-boots and wide-eyed, innocent act that brought me perilously close to putting my fist through the television.
They had the finalists vote, Survivor-style, about who would face potential elimination. Except - twist! - they showed everyone's secret footage to the group. Awkward! So little Esther Ku who's I'm-the-cutest schtick and nails-on-chalkboard laugh was driving the others nuts gets far and away the most votes. But, she gets to take two other acts with her to the three comics enter, one comic leaves elimination.
Here's were we get our first post-Clintonian-era, bitches-taking-each-other-down moment. Ku told the other girl she wouldn't vote for her. The other girl said, I won't vote for you either. But of course she did. So Ku took her along to the show, along with another funny, original (if not really stand-up) act.
I figured I would get DVR space back when the girls knocked each other out and the guys with guitars double act sailed through.
But again, either clever editing or straight up vote fixing saw my heroine make it through while Ku, deservingly, came in dead last.
So, at least the super-offensive option is gone, but c'mon if you were only going to have two girls, why waste a slot on Ms. Ku?
Two women. Just Two. Two. Out of 12. Out of 13 if you count that one act was two dudes.