Wednesday, February 25, 2004

'See The Movie, Buy The Nail'

"But nothing says 'slightly masochistic Jesus fanatic' like adorning your fine self with a two-inch silver pewter crucifixion-nail pendant, hanging 'round your neck from a nice 24-inch leather chord. Oh my yes. "

Now, this Notes & Errata column kinda gives too much ammo to those who see San Francisco as a bastion of crazed, liberal, souless blasphemers. But he has a point too. Do check out the film's website. Who knew Jesus was such a fan of tie-in merchandise. SUCH a fan . . . A Nail necklace? Honestly, kids, in the words of Kevin Smith: "Jesus didn't come to give us the willies. He was a booster!"

Or this point is fun too:
"After all, cheap movie swag is an American tradition. We expect and demand it and aren't we all just a little shocked this time out that we can't have, say, a cute Mary Magdalene mood ring for girls that changes color as your divine feminine power is shut down and demonized and made whorelike by the Catholic elders? "

Today is Ash Wednesday. As a practicing (not devout, not great, but church attending) Catholic, this movie makes me cringe. So do all the ADL types who say it's Anti-Semetic. Maybe it is, but to them, it sometimes seems like EVERY telling of the Easter Story is Anti-Semetic. Hey, I don't blame them. If Jesus hadn't died, we wouldn't have a religion. And in case no one noticed, Jesus isn't so much into the whole blame thing.

So happy Ash Wednesday to you all. I went to mass and have since had several dozen people advise me that I have a smudge on my forehead - I thank them for their concern. I won't be seeing the Passion - probably ever. Not because I'm a closet atheist, or because I'm offended, but because, in short, I don't like Mel Gibson movies. Hated the Patriot. Never saw Braveheart. Not my bag. But y'all have fun.

And don't run with those necklaces on.

See The Movie, Buy The Nail / Jesus died for your sins -- and also to sell you a really bitchin' "Passion" coffee mug:

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